Sketchy Things Everyone Just Ignores About Ryan Lochte
At the 2016 Summer Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro, the accomplishments of the world's greatest athletes were overshadowed by "America's Idiot Sea Cow," also known as swimmer Ryan Lochte. During the Games, Lochte told NBC's Billy Bush that he was robbed at gunpoint during a night out with some of his teammates. This alleged crime turned out to be a complete lie, which he later explained to Matt Lauer, saying "I'm taking full responsibility, because I over-exaggerated that story. If I never did that, we wouldn't be in this mess." That's for sure, but this whole lying-about-being-robbed-and-shaming-the-city-of-Rio debacle is actually not the only shady thing about this Olympian. We've rounded up Lochte's sketchiest antics, because abs.
He's a plagiarizer
Lochte is the king of cultural appropriation. Remember his American flag grill? He even went so far as to attempt to copyright his catchphrase "Jeah!," but Compton rapper MC Eiht claims he, not Lochte, coined that word back in 1988. Eiht told TMZ, "Why try and trademark something his a** didn't even create? I am mad that he isn't giving me proper recognition for taking my saying. He is just disrespectful."
Lochte says he didn't rip the phrase from MC Eiht, but he did steal it from Young Jeezy, switching the "ch" in Jeezy's "Chea!" for a "j." In the end, the trademark ended up going to a Milwaukee clothing company. Unfortunately, this means no more Ryan Lochte limited edition all-American Reezy Jeah sunglasses.
He's not as nonviolent as he says
During their one-on-one interview, Matt Lauer said Rio police claimed Lochte was "angry and belligerent" that notorious night at the gas station and the security guard on the scene was concerned Lochte might get aggressive. Lochte responded, "That's not me, is getting mad and angry and, like, wanting to fight or anything like that." (Lochte often doesn't speak in fully coherent sentences.) Bad grammar or not, the swimmer's statement doesn't hold water.
Several media outlets, including the Washington Post, reported that Lochte punched an advertisement in a metal frame off of the wall at the gas station, and Lochte's teammate, Gunnar Bentz, who was with him that night, told police Lochte got in a "heated argument" with the guards.
He never actually took responsibility for his actions
While Lochte "apologized" on Instagram for not being "candid" about what really happened in Rio, he never actually publicly apologized for peeing on a building, getting aggressive with authorities, and destroying property at the gas station. In fact, Lochte told Lauer multiple times that he and his teammates did "nothing." He apologized for letting his team down and taking attention away from the Games, but not for perpetuating the negative reputation that Brazil already had going into the games.
He's a glorified frat boy
No offense to frat boys, but just like the bros you went to college with, Lochte's seems vapid, shallow, and makes horrible psychedelic art. According to an editorial on Very Smart Brothas, the swimmer's "bro bonafides have been established for years. We've all known he was dumber than a luggage wheel and prone to bouts of brotastic behavior, but he was considered to be harmless because he's famous and talented and attractive and...Oh, and he's White."
Lochte somehow, at least for a brief period in U.S. history, convinced America he was a role model, when in actuality he comes off kind of clueless. On his short-lived reality TV show, What Would Ryan Lochte Do?, he was once stumped by the definition of "douchebag." Need more proof that you don't want America's children looking up to Lochte? Check out this interview where the Olympian's inability to answer simple questions brings the news anchors to tears.
He's a womanizer
A few years ago, Lochte's friend said he was with a different woman all the time, and even his own mother said that he was only into one-night stands. According to E! News, Lochte was not looking looking for a relationship during the Olympic Games, but he was on Tinder and kind of dating Playboy Playmate Kayla Rae Reid. An insider told E!, "Ryan was with a Playmate...He thinks she is hot, that's about it." (I'm sure that makes Reid feel great.)
He wouldn't survive without a babysitter
As a 28-year-old man, Lochte needed his mother to show him how to tie a tie, and he reportedly couldn't write a speech without her help. "You're like, the world's greatest mom," he says on an episode of What Would Ryan Lochte Do? (via The Guardian) "You know you've helped me out so much, throughout the good times and the hard times." Such sweet sentiments make it even more terrible that Lochte lied to her, inciting a national incident. Clearly, he can't be left unsupervised for that long.