Where Jaden And Willow Smith Will Be In 2025
At the time of this writing, 17-year-old Jaden Smith recently gave an interview in which he suggested that ten years from now nobody will know where he is, because he'll be secretly advancing society through Banksy-esque guerilla art. But the son of Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith is an admitted provocateur who, along with his 14-year-old sister, Willow, likes to stir the pot via tabloids and social media. So, we don't think either of them will be giving up the limelight anytime soon. Here are some predictions about where Jaden and Willow Smith might be in the year 2025.
Jaden: Sitting On His Throne As "King of Social Media"
Just one of the lessons Jaden has taught us is that education is unnecessary because we can learn everything we need to know from looking at our hands. Seriously. That's literally one of his all-caps tweets that have become as legendary as they are perplexing. With Facebook at over 1 billion users and Twitter at over 300 million, we can only assume that social media will easily dominate human communication by 2025. We already obsessively share pictures, videos, and self-destructing messages with apps on our phones, so it seems like we've got every form of interaction covered. But we know that even if something currently unthinkable develops, like hovering drones projecting holograms back and forth to one another, Jaden will have the most followers as he floats in front of our faces, delivering philosophical gems like "How Can Mirrors Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't Real," or "Most Trees Are Blue."
Willow: Writing A Tell-All Memoir
Being the younger sister to her more outspoken and arguably loonier brother has to be tough for Willow Smith. Sure, she tries to chime in when Jaden starts one of his rants about metaphysical planes and forms of physics he completely made up, but she always comes off sounding like a tag-along. That said, we're thinking another decade in Jaden's shadow will be just enough for her to get fed up and want to have her own, independent voice for once. Publishers will scramble at the chance to get a disgruntled rundown of Will and Jada's known association with Scientology, and we're all going to revel in the passages where she turns the tables on Jaden. We can only hope for possible chapter titles like "Bedwetting: A Philosophical Discussion On Why Jaden Did This Until He Was 16," or "Dad's Music: I'd Rather Listen To This Crap Than Anything Jaden Has To Say."
Jaden: Running For Congress
The funny thing about having a giant ego is that while you believe yourself to be the absolute best, you still need the constant validation of others, which is why Jaden's public declaration of his plan to become a secret social vigilante is so hilariously contradictory. Fortunately for him, politics exists, and it's a system that loves nothing better than young (preferably rich) people who have decided they're the answer to society's ills. Obviously, Jaden's going to take a crack at the presidency after he turns 35, but in 2025 he'll only be eligible to run for a seat in the House of Representatives. And even if he doesn't win it, we're fairly confident President Kanye West will hook him up with a sweet appointment in his second term. Just tell him you made him Ambassador to Dope Beats, President West, he's not even going to realize that's not a real thing, but it should keep him occupied and hopefully quiet for a few years.
Willow: Bitterly Feuding With Taylor Swift
With the hit song "Whip My Hair" under her belt, Willow has already proven that she can step out and dominate the pop music world anytime she chooses. But it's been a few years since she's cranked out another chart-topper, and Taylor Swift has animal instincts when it comes to sniffing out a rival. It's feasible to think that—despite her unparalleled current fame—Taylor might be on the downslope of her career in 2025, and since Willow will then be exactly the age Taylor is now, she will be prime pop starlet gold. We wouldn't put it past Taylor to have already begun building an arsenal which she will passive-aggressively unleash on social media as soon as headlines start declaring Willow Smith the new Queen of Pop. Fortunately, Willow has spent her entire life under the tutelage of Jaden, a genuine Twitter artiste, and she won't go down without a fight. Ultimately though, the loser will be all of us, who will most likely still be pathetically addicted to caring about the fleeting thoughts of famous people.
Jaden: Married To Kylie Jenner
Having dated for years, Jaden and Kylie broke up amidst scandalous rumors that Will and Jada did not approve of the youngest Jenner's wild behavior. This was pre-surgically enhanced and lip-injected Kylie, so we're going to assume that Kris Jenner didn't take too kindly to this slight. As a mother who seems to pride herself on the rich and famous lovers her daughters land, we're convinced the infamously meddling momager hatched a diabolical plan to make her daughter so irresistible to the young Smith, that he would have no choice but to run right back to her. It's not out of the realm of possibility for Kris Jenner to independently finance some type of mind control chip by 2025 and implant it in Kylie's brain, just to get the Kardashian hooks firmly embedded in that sweet Smith family fortune. Did you know that Will Smith is worth an estimated $250 million dollars and will continue to get back-end money on a long list of film and music projects? Well, Kris Jenner and the chip in Kylie's brain are well aware of this fact, which is the driving force behind its prime directive of getting a ring on Kylie's finger with no prenup.
Jaden And Willow: Starring In The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Reboot
If Hollywood has taught us anything in the past ten years, it's that they fully intend to reboot, reimagine, prequel, and sequel every lucrative property they've ever produced until we're watching Grown Ups 17 and just drooling all over ourselves. We're honestly amazed that a Fresh Prince reboot hasn't happened yet. Will Smith was 22 when he starred as "Will Smith," a character he admitted was basically a heightened version of himself, which makes the prospect of Jaden stepping into this role so exciting. At 27, he'll be a little older, but we can barely imagine what a heightened version of Jaden's personality would be other than him literally suggesting he's the savior of mankind. Willow will obviously play Ashley even though they were cousins on the show, but it's not like making her play Hilary was even an option—nobody remembers Hilary. Oh, but who will play Carlton, and what will his dance be like in 2025?! Sorry, we just got really excited about this thing and also realized that Will Smith was an executive producer on the original show, so we know we can count on Kris Jenner getting the greenlight on this for us.
Jaden And Willow: Existing On A Transcendental Plane Of Prana Energy Or Something
In a famously bizarre 2014 interview with T Magazine, Jaden and Willow seemed to go out of their way to repeatedly bring the conversation back to consciousness, whatever the heck "prana energy" is, and the falsehood of reality. A big theme that surfaces anytime these two speak is the desire to break free of norms and leave a lasting imprint on the world through their art, despite the fact that their art is mostly just questionable fashion and songs that are somehow worse than "Gettin' Jiggy Wit It." So, combined with some rapid leaps in artificial intelligence, it's not out of the realm of possibility to believe that these two very wealthy, very eccentric people would be the first volunteers to upload their minds into some sort of cloud-based consciousness. Once there, they can finally look down on us regular folk in a physical sense like they've been doing mentally since the moment they realized that being a famous kid is basically like being born into royalty.