Messed Up Things About Taylor Swift's Relationships Everyone Just Ignores

Taylor Swift might have released her sixth studio album, Reputation, in November 2017, but her actual reputation has been a topic of discussion for most of her career. After going from one Hollywood hottie to the next for the better part of the last decade, Swift has been labeled a serial dater with no signs of stopping. 

It's not news to anyone that it's widely believed that the pop star turns her multitude of relationships into multi-million dollar albums by writing juicy songs about her exes. However, while you're picking apart every tune for hidden things you might have missed, you might just be missing out on the bigger picture issues surrounding Taylor Swift's relationships. Aside from shady song lyrics, here are some messed up things about the superstar's relationships that everyone just ignores. 

She claims to want privacy, but makes her breakups very public

Over the years, Swift has become increasingly critical of the media for wanting to delve into every aspect of her relationships and for labeling her a "serial dater." In an interview with Vogue in April 2016, Swift was asked what she would say to her 19-year-old self and replied: "Hey, you're going to date just like a normal 20-something should be allowed to, but you're going to be a national lightning rod for slut-shaming." 

First of all, Swift has been making a living writing songs about her love life since she was a teen. She pours her soul into her work, but then expects the world to turn a blind eye to the relationships that serve as the inspiration? Sorry Tay, you can't have your cake and eat it too.

Also, it's kind of hard to accept her role as a victim who just wants a little privacy when she publicly adds fuel to the fire. In 2008, when Swift and Joe Jonas broke up, she posted a now infamous YouTube video shaming Joe for breaking up with her over a 27-second phone call. In 2009, Swift took to the Saturday Night Live stage and sang an opening monologue that referenced her split from Jonas and her subsequent relationship with Twilight star Taylor Lautner. 

Newsflash: making your relationships public fodder is so not the way to keep them under wraps.

She manipulates facts post-relationship

When a romance goes sour, details about the relationship often become a bit of a he said, she said situation. Aspects of the relationship that were once seen through rose-colored glasses are suddenly viewed in a much different light. However, there's a difference between remembering things a little bit differently and changing the facts completely. Apparently, Swift is guilty of falling into the latter category. 

Regarding the aforementioned 27-second phone, according to Jonas, fans didn't get all the facts from Swift. Although the breakup call between the two pop stars might have lasted less than 30 seconds, Jonas claims that he wasn't the one to end it. He wrote in a MySpace post (via People) in 2008: "I did not end the conversation. Someone else did. Phone calls can only last as long as the person on the other end of the line is willing to talk." He concluded, "I wish the best for the other person, but could not sit back any longer and leave our fans with a wrong impression of the truth. Hope this helps enlighten a little."

That definitely sounds like a nice way of saying that Swift's hot pants might be on fire.

Did she set up Calvin Harris?

It's all fun and games and unprecedented album sales until an ex decides to flip the script on Swift. 

Calvin Harris was publicly embarrassed in 2016 for supposedly not giving Swift credit for helping write his smash hit "This is What You Came For." That info was conveniently confirmed by Swift's camp soon after Harris and Swift broke up and she took up with actor Tom Hiddleston. 

The typically reserved Harris didn't take too kindly to Swift stealing his thunder. He aired his grievances on social media in a series of since-deleted tweets, writing, "I figure if you're happy in your new relationship you should focus on that instead of trying to tear your ex bf down for something to do. I know you're off tour and you need someone new to try and bury like Katy [Perry] ETC but I'm not that guy, sorry. I won't allow it." 

Truth be told, Swift reportedly wanted to remain anonymous on Harris' tune and chose to use the pseudonym Nils Sjoberg in the credits, but all that apparently changed at some point after the split. Unfortunately, Harris apparently didn't get the memo and had continued to shield Swift's involvement in his work, going so far as to tell Ryan Seacrest that he wasn't interested in collaborating with her.

Suffice it to say, the media firestorm was clearly not what Harris bargained for.

She threw another woman under the bus over an old relationship

For someone who's such an advocate of girl squads, all of that female empowerment seems to go out the window when Swift feels that she's been wronged in a relationship. Actress Camilla Belle learned that lesson the hard way. 

Jonas and Swift broke up in 2008, and he soon after hooked up with Belle. Two years later, it seems Swift was still fuming about the end of the relationship when she penned the song, "Better Than Revenge." Lyrics include, "She's not a saint and she's not what you think/She's an actress, whoa/She's better known for the things that she does/On the mattress." 


Although Belle remained mum on the song at the time, it seems the actress was just letting karma do its thing. In July 2016, in the midst of the Swift vs. KimYe feud, Belle seemingly showed her support for Team KimYe by posting the following quote on Instagram: "No need for revenge. Just sit back & wait. Those who hurt you will eventually screw up themselves & if you're lucky, God will let you watch." 

How's that for a mic drop?

Her romances have involved big age gaps

Age might just be a number, but it also might be a reason why Swift seems to be so unlucky with love. Let's take a look at her track record. 

In 2010, Swift dated musician John Mayer. Fast forward to the implosion that was the end of their relationship and the subsequent song, "Dear John." In the tune, Swift croons, "Don't you think 19 is too young to be played by your dark twisted games, when I loved you so?" and "Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?" Considering there was a 12-year age gap between them, we're going to go out on a limb here and say that she probably was too young to be a part of Mayer's wonderland

Swift found herself in relationships with 9-year age gaps when she dated actors Jake Gyllenhaal and Hiddleston in 2010 and 2016, respectively. 

However, Swift isn't just into age gaps with guys who are older than her. She played the older partner during her brief relationship with Conor Kennedy, who was still in high school when he dated a 22-year-old Swift. 

She obsesses over short-lived relationships

At some point, we've all been guilty of lingering on an old flame a little too long. However, the extent of the reminiscing is usually an occasional trip to their Instagram page or a text with the help of some liquid courage. But if you're Swift, the reminiscing just might materialize in the bulk of an album. 

Swift's 2012 album Red would have been rather content deficient if it hadn't been for her three-month relationship with Gyllenhaal. Nope, that's not a typo — three months. According to Vulture, about five of the 16 songs from Red point fingers at the actor. 

Gyllenhaal wasn't the only ex-lover to allegedly leave an album-worthy impact on Swift's life. 2014's 1989 was supposedly Harry Styles' time to shine. Although the pair dated for less than a year, Styles seems to be the inspiration behind at least four songs on the album

As for Harris and Hiddleston, those two allegedly have to share a breakup song. More on that later. 

She's only written one obvious apology song

Swift has sold millions of albums, won 10 Grammys, and written around 90 songs, but of those songs, she's only written one obvious apology tune —"Back to December." Swift reportedly wrote the song about Lautner, singing about "swallowing her pride" and "saying sorry for that night." 

While we don't know the exact details of what went down that fateful winter, it definitely doesn't sound very enjoyable for either party. Although Lautner clearly got kicked to the curb, he can take comfort in the fact that he was apparently the only guy Swift has ever dated that she felt like she had wronged. We're sure a few other exes (read: Mayer) would gladly sign up for an apology tune. 

Alas, it seems "Band-aids don't fix bullet holes" and apologies don't win Grammys. 

She let one relationship spawn an endless feud

We can all pretend that some dancers were the reason behind Swift and Katy Perry's falling out, but let's be real, this feud has Mayer's name written all over it. 

The Swift vs. Perry beef is the feud to end all feuds. Even if you've been living under a rock for the past few years, you probably still know about the bad blood between these two pop stars. According to urban legend — aka Swift's 2014 interview with Rolling Stone – she declared herself and Perry "straight up enemies" after Perry allegedly tried to hire dancers who were working for Swift to "sabotage" Swift's tour. 

However, sources told Page Six the feud actually started over Mayer, who was romantically linked to both superstars. Perry and Mayer began dating in the summer of 2012, two years after his split from Swift, but as we've already discussed à la Jonas and Belle, two years is still fair game for Swift to hold a grudge. 

Clearly, Swift and Perry are not followers of the sisters over misters rule. 

Hiddleswift felt like a PR stunt

Swift is known for rapid-fire romances, but no love affair was quite as speedy as her blink-and-you'll-miss-it relationship with Hiddleston. From a European PDA tour to meeting the family, "Hiddleswift" packed about a year's worth of relationship milestones into just three months. 

Some members of Swift's camp reportedly accused Hiddleston of using the pop star to ramp up his fame, but other things seemed off about the relationship. The most questionable moment? When Hiddleston was spotted rocking an "I Heart T.S." tank top at one of her annual Fourth of July bashes. Now we're not PR people, but letting your client wear their girlfriend's initials on a souvenir-esque shirt a month or so into the relationship doesn't seem good for optics, even if one is head over heels in love. 

Hiddleston doesn't seem to be the only one who got something out of the fling. The first paparazzi shots of the couple hit the internet the same day Kim Kardashian's scathing GQ interview about Swift was published — how convenient. 

At the end of the day, signs point to the fact that Swift and Hiddleston may have been using each other, though they've both emerged relatively unscathed. 

She might have wronged Harris

Swift is usually not straightforward about the subjects or content of her songs. Instead, she leaves clues in her liner notes, knowing full well that followers will dissect the content like archaeologists at a dig. Sometimes the subjects themselves even come forward to shed light on a song.

But on "Getaway Car," from her Reputation album, the superstar seems to get very candid about the unraveling of her relationship with Harris. Check out this line: "I wanted to leave him/I needed a reason." All signs points to Hiddleston being her metaphorical escape vehicle. 

Swift also croons, "Think about the place where you first met me," which has led some fans to believe she's talking about the Met Gala after-party where she infamously danced with Hiddleston

And there's this lyric: "But with three of us, honey, it's a side show/And a circus ain't a love story/ And now we're both sorry (we're both sorry)." Why is this telling? In Harris' British GQ interview, he said the "aftermath of the relationship [with Swift] was way more heavily publicized than the relationship itself. When we were together, we were very careful for it not to be a media circus. She respected my feelings in that sense." 

Could this song be Swift's way of quasi-apologizing for turning the end of their romance into a media circus? 

Her baggage follows her into new relationships

Prior to the release of Reputation, Swift held secret listening sessions so some of her most dedicated fans could hear the album before it debuted. At one of the sessions, she reportedly told fans that if anyone questioned who the song "Gorgeous" was about, they should reply that "it is 100 percent about her sweet angel boyfriend of one year," aka actor Joe Alwyn. That seems sweet and innocent enough, right? A good chunk of the album is suspected to be about Alwyn, so it doesn't seem crazy to assume "Gorgeous" was written about him. 

However, despite Swift being seemingly head over heels for her new beau, she still somehow finds time to shade previous relationships. In "King of My Heart," Swift sings about her so-called king and boasts "all the boys and their expensive cars, with their Range Rovers and their Jaguars, never took me quite where you do." "Yes, Harris drove a Range Rover and Hiddleston a Jaguar," reported E! News.

You would think that if Swift was 100 percent into her current relationship she wouldn't feel the need to dwell on the old ones. Alas, that seems to be a recurring theme with the pop star. Until she's able to let go of the past and fully focus on the relationship she's in, it seems like history is doomed to repeat itself.