Tragic Details About Marilyn Monroe
The following article includes allegations of domestic abuse, child abuse, suicide, and sexual assault.
Something about Marilyn Monroe has captured the hearts of the nation since the rise of her stardom in the 1950s. Whether it's her alluring beauty, her endless confidence, or her feminine mystique, people across the globe can't help but dream about either being with her or being her.
But one of the reasons she still lives on to this day as an icon has less to do with her movie roles and more to do with the tragedies she faced behind the curtain of Hollywood's glitz and glam. From the alleged abuse she experienced at the hands of her foster family, to the pain she endured in her romantic pursuits, all the way up to her sudden death, it's fair to say that Monroe's life wasn't as fairytale-like as the movies in which she starred. According to The Guardian, her former husband, Arthur Miller, even told the blond bombshell, "You're the saddest girl I've ever met."
The star has spoken up about how much her sadness consumed her while growing up. "As I grew older I knew I was different from other children because there were no kisses or promises in my life," she said of her isolated upbringing, according to her autobiography, "My Story." "I often felt lonely and wanted to die. I would try to cheer myself up with daydreams." So just what were the real-life horrors that shaped Marilyn Monroe into the beautiful spirit she is remembered as today?
If you or anyone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by dialing 988 or by calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
Marilyn Monroe's father abandoned her before she was born
In modern times, more and more individuals are growing up in homes that stray from the traditional nuclear family unit, but when Marilyn Monroe was born in June 1926, the absence of a father figure was much more taboo. Not having a dad at home took a massive toll on her overall well-being, and, according to multiple sources, she was constantly on the lookout for a father figure in her life. Per the biography, "Marilyn Monroe: The Private Life of a Public Icon," "Norma Jeane would spend a lifetime looking for this man in others, wanting to know him, loving him, passionately wanting him to love her back."
Eventually, during her starlet days, Monroe was able to get in contact with her father. In the hopes of getting to know him, the "Seven Year Itch" star was met with severe disappointment. "Look, I'm married and I have a family," her father allegedly said. "I don't have anything to say to you. Call my lawyer."
Of course, this traumatized the actor more, and she would go on to find herself in a string of abusive relationships. "These men — some kind, but mostly cruel — were a manifestation of the father she never knew and the love she never felt strongly enough," Charles Casillo, author of "Marilyn Monroe: The Private Life of a Public Icon" wrote. "The more powerful the man, the more worthy she felt."
If you or someone you know is dealing with domestic abuse, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233. You can also find more information, resources, and support at their website.
Mental illness runs in her family
Throughout Marilyn Monroe's life, matters of mental illness were swept under the rug. Because such subjects were much more stigmatized in the mid-century, Monroe, who is thought to have faced mental illness, was unable to get the proper help she needed. This was certainly the case for her mother, Gladys Baker, who is reported to have had paranoid schizophrenia (per Biography).
Many scientists and psychologists have speculated about the Hollywood legend's mental health. According to Claudia Kalb, a science journalist, Monroe might have had borderline personality disorder. "What is clear is that Monroe suffered from severe mental distress," she revealed in "Andy Warhol Was a Hoarder: Inside the Minds of History's Great Personalities." "Her symptoms included a feeling of emptiness, a split or confused identity, extreme emotional volatility, unstable relationships, and all textbook characteristics of a condition called borderline personality, an impulsivity that drove her to drug addiction and suicide." Her psychologist allegedly diagnosed her with severe depression as well. "He told me I was a very, very sick girl and had been a very, very sick girl for many years," Monroe wrote in one of her letters (via Far Out Magazine). "He asked me how I could possibly work when I was depressed."
If you or someone you know needs help with mental health, please contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741, call the National Alliance on Mental Illness helpline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264), or visit the National Institute of Mental Health website.
Her childhood was consistently unstable
Throughout Marilyn Monroe's tumultuous life, all she ever wanted was to feel a sense of belonging. With a permanently absent father and a mother who was unable to take care of her due to her own mental illness, the Hollywood legend simply wanted a guardian to supply her with safety and assurance. Unfortunately, Monroe was unable to find a stable guardian, and was instead pushed around from one foster home to the next.
The star saw herself as more than just an orphan, however. Instead, she felt like a "waif," otherwise known as an individual with no real place to call home. Understandably, this left her deeply wounded. "I'm not calling myself an orphan," she said in an interview featured in the documentary "The Mystery of Marilyn Monroe: The Unheard Tapes." "I was brought up a waif. Yeah, I was never used to being happy. So that wasn't something I was sort of counting on."
According to Monroe, one of the reasons she became such an icon in the entertainment industry had less to do with her talent and more to do with feeling so out of place. Per her autobiography, "My Story," she said, "I knew I belonged to the Public and to the world, not because I was talented, or even beautiful, but because I had never belonged to anything or anyone else. The Public was the only family, the only Prince Charming and the only home I had ever dreamed of."
If you or someone you know may be the victim of child abuse, please contact the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-4-A-Child (1-800-422-4453) or contact their live chat services.
She was allegedly sexually abused by a caretaker
Tragically, Marilyn Monroe reported that she suffered sexual abuse at the hands of one of her caretakers when she was only 8 years old. With her mother being unable to take care of her due to mental illness and her father's permanent absence, Monroe regarded herself as a "waif" (per "Marilyn Monroe: The Private Life of a Public Icon"). Without a parental guardian to take care of her, she was forced to go from one home to the other, where she never felt truly wanted or cared for. During one stay at a boarding house, a caretaker locked Monroe in a room, claiming "Now you can't get out," before reportedly sexually abusing her.
Monroe wrote about the traumatic experience, which was documented in "Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters," which collated writings of the star. Of the abuse she faced, she wrote: "I will not be punished for it or be whipped or be threatened or not be loved or sent to hell to burn."
The unfair abuse she endured throughout her childhood is ultimately the very thing that shattered her spirit. Her former husband and famous playwright Arthur Miller wrote in his autobiography, "Timebends: A Life" that Monroe was consistently unhappy and distrusting of men as a result of her childhood.
If you or anyone you know has been a victim of sexual assault, help is available. Visit the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network website or contact RAINN's National Helpline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673).
Marilyn Monroe allegedly experienced sexual abuse at Hollywood parties
Marilyn Monroe achieved her dream of becoming an actor and acquired the fame and fortune that came with success, but that didn't mean she would be safe from trauma, especially at the hands of the studio execs who controlled her career. In 2016, when the #MeToo movement burst onto the scene in Hollywood, the world was exposed to the industry's severe history of sexual abuse by powerful men in the business.
However, allegedly, the sexual abuse that Monroe suffered went beyond what actors have been experiencing since Hollywood's inception. Not only was she subjected to unwanted advances behind closed doors, she was reportedly blatantly abused at industry events, in plain view of many others. According to "Marilyn: The Private Life of a Public Icon," one of her friends, Orson Welles, had witnessed the abuse at a party. "Marilyn was surrounded by men and one reached out and tore off her top, revealing her breasts. Marilyn, Welles said, laughed with the others at this indignity. Laughter hid her fury." She was allegedly "held down" and taken advantage of at these parties, with no one doing anything to stop it.
If you or anyone you know has been a victim of sexual assault, help is available. Visit the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network website or contact RAINN's National Helpline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673).
She endured domestic abuse at the hands of Joe DiMaggio
Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio were an incredibly unlikely pair. While he was a famous baseball star for the New York Yankees, Marilyn Monroe was a sex symbol and famous actor. He was soft-spoken and reserved, while she was a glitzy bombshell. Despite their differences, however, the two ended up falling in love and got married quickly into their courtship. But while DiMaggio assumed that their marriage would turn Monroe into a traditional stay-at-home housewife, Monroe had zero plans of letting her stardom burn out any time soon.
"Joe misunderstood Monroe," a source close to both stars said in the biography, "Joe and Marilyn: Legends in Love." "Like, here's this young, beautiful woman on the verge of becoming one of the most successful and famous actresses in the world, an international superstar, and she's going to give it all up to make lasagna for Joe and spend her days changing diapers."
Tragically, DiMaggio allegedly physically abused Monroe throughout their marriage, to the point where she was left with bruises. Not a year into their marriage, Monroe filed for divorce (per Life). Though she allegedly endured violence at the hands of DiMaggio, the two remained incredibly close. In fact, according to a report by ABC News, DiMaggio's famous last words were "I'll finally get to see Marilyn."
If you or someone you know is dealing with domestic abuse, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233. You can also find more information, resources, and support at their website.
Her heartbreaking divorce from Arthur Miller
While Marilyn Monroe was a Hollywood sex symbol who was (wrongfully) criticized for being nothing more than a dumb blonde, Arthur Miller was regarded as an intellectual playwright who was well respected by the general public. Yet despite their polarizing social statuses, Miller was the only lover Monroe had who truly saw her as more than just the bombshell society so often dismissed her as. Over the years, Monroe and Miller developed a beautiful friendship, though since they were both in respective relationships, they didn't become romantically involved for quite some time. But nearly a decade into their friendship, the two finally became lovers. As detailed in "Marilyn Monroe: The Private Life of a Public Icon," Miller represented a sense of security that Monroe had never before possessed. "To Marilyn, Miller represented an open door leading to a safe place."
Their romance was extremely passionate, until their differences ultimately ended up destroying their union. According to "Marilyn Monroe: The Private Life of a Public Icon," she had read a diary entry of his where he regarded his wife as an "embarrassment." Of course, this destroyed Monroe.
She knew their marriage had problems though. She once said, via Biography, that "I wasn't sweet all through. He should love the monster, too. But maybe I'm too demanding. Maybe there's no man who could put up with all of me. I put Arthur through a lot, I know. But he also put me through a lot."
Marilyn Monroe experienced four miscarriages
Because Marilyn Monroe never had a family while growing up, she was very eager to have children so she could create one of her own. Tragically, the "Misfits" star found herself unable to have kids, and she had several miscarriages due to her endometriosis. She allegedly had a miscarriage as the result of a pregnancy with her "Let's Make Love" co-star Yves Montand, (per the Daily Mail), but that would be far from the only time she lost a child. In total, she had four miscarriages, which left Monroe devastated.
According to Charles Casillo, the journalist and author of "Marilyn Monroe: The Private Life of a Public Icon," it was her miscarriage with her former husband, Arthur Miller, that really affected her emotional well-being. "The miscarriage sent Marilyn into an extreme depression. She felt somehow that the failure to carry a child was her failure as a woman." Casillo then wrote that Monroe attempted suicide as a result of the loss of her pregnancy.
If you or someone you know needs help with mental health, please contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741, call the National Alliance on Mental Illness helpline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264), or visit the National Institute of Mental Health website.
Her death shocked the nation
Marilyn Monroe was the biggest star on the face of the planet. Because of this, her untimely death left the nation — and the world — in a state of utter shock. The cause of her death is reported to be a result of suicide. Per the Los Angeles Times, which reported on her death in 1962, "Marilyn Monroe, a troubled beauty who failed to find happiness as Hollywood's brightest star, was discovered dead in her Brentwood home of an apparent overdose of sleeping pills Sunday."
Monroe's fame only seemed to amplify following her tragic death, according to The Washington Post. And with the new movie "Blonde" premiering on Netflix, (which is based on the Joyce Carol Oates novel about the Hollywood legend), it's clear that Monroe's star power is unlikely to ever burn out. She was a staple for American culture as well as pop culture as a whole. Per Thought Catalogue, Nedvela wrote of the movie star: "When you speak of the American way of life, everybody thinks of chewing gum, Coca-Cola and Marilyn Monroe."
If you or anyone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by dialing 988 or by calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255).