The real reason Adele is getting a divorce

Adele and husband Simon Konecki are so private that no one was even really sure they were actually married until five years after they'd gotten together, when she said during her acceptance speech (via People) for one of her zillions (OK, 15, but close enough) of Grammys in 2017, "Grammys, I appreciate it. The Academy, I love you. My manager, my husband and my son — you're the only reason I do it." (She even reportedly referred to Konecki as her "partner" backstage at the time, and she didn't even confirm her son's name until 2014; Angelo was born in 2012.)

Because the couple took such pains to fly under the radar, it was truly shocking news when the siren's team announced that she and Konecki had split. "Adele and her partner have separated," her reps wrote in an email to the Associated Press. "They are committed to raising their son together lovingly. As always they ask for privacy. There will be no further comment."

Predictably, there aren't too many details about the split. Here's what we know so far (besides the fact that whatever Adele's next numbered album is will likely be terrific).

She and her husband were at different places in their lives

A big reason Adele and Simon Konecki may not have worked out is also, oddly enough, a reason she thought they were a great couple: They're simply at different stages of their lives, and their age difference (Konecki is 14 years older than Adele) only exacerbated their issues. The singer explained to Vanity Fair in October 2016, "Simon is already who he is. I'm still becoming who I'm going to be. He's confident. He's perfect." She added, "He's not threatened by any stage of my life that I'm going for, and that's an amazing thing."

Perhaps part of the problem, then, was that the person Adele went on to become during their relationship wasn't a match for the fully-formed man that Konecki already was when they first got together. In fact, she told the magazine that her relationship with Konecki — who was previously married, and already had a child when they met — was "the most serious relationship [she'd] ever been in."

Distance didn't make their hearts grow fonder

The tabloids are already out in force with a theory that a big part of why Adele and Simon Konecki broke up is because they each preferred living on opposite sides of the pond. Insiders told The Mirror that Adele loved life in Los Angeles and New York City, where she's often been spotted dining out with celebrity pals, while Konecki enjoyed staying in the United Kingdom. The outlet also explained that Adele hated winters in England and moved to Los Angeles to escape the cold — and Konecki wasn't always able to join her there because of his work as a philanthropist and CEO of Drop4Drop, a clean water charity.

"It was not that Simon was staying away, but his charity business was booming and it meant he was travelling across the globe overseeing projects," a source said. "He would be away in Africa and in the Indian sub-continent for weeks on end too. His passion for his cause and his success often took him away from his wife."

The source added, "They had an unconventional relationship, but that had worked for so long. Some of us thought she liked it that way. But in the end they were barely together."

They had different ideas of work-life balance

While Simon Konecki's passion for work drove him away from home, Adele has said that if her work as a pop superstar were to hamper her marriage and motherhood, she'd stop in an instant. "All of my relationships are more important to me than any tour I'll ever do," Adele told Vanity Fair in October 2016. "If my relationship with Simon or my relationship with Angelo started to flounder a bit now, I would pull out of my tour." The ever-down-to-earth singer added candidly, "My life is more important to me than anything I'm doing because how the f**k am I supposed to write a record if I don't have a life? If I don't have a real life, then it's game over anyway."

There is also, of course, the idea that some of Adele's best work has been inspired by breakups and fresh new romances, so perhaps her seemingly stable relationship with Konecki was boring and hindering her creativity. She hinted in 2011 (via The Mirror) that marriage may not work out for her well as a result. "If I ever get married, it'll be, 'Darling, I need a divorce,'" she joked. "'It's been three years — I've got a record to write.'"

Their lifestyles didn't match up

It wasn't just the warm climate that Adele loved about Los Angeles. She also made a lot of famous friends and is reportedly recognized much less in public than she was when she resided in her native England, leading her to want to hob-knob with her A-list pals this side of the pond even more. A source told The Mirror that Adele's friendship with Jennifer Lawrence in particular made her embrace living stateside.

"Adele found an exciting new social circle in LA and New York of strong Hollywood women who loved her for her humor and down-to-earth ways," the source claimed. "Jennifer especially bonded with her and in the last 15 months they have become great mates. Adele became settled in that life, while all the girls doted on Angelo too." Lawrence isn't Adele's only Oscar-winning pal, as she's also been spotted out with their mutual friend Emma Stone.

Friends of the couple apparently saw the writing on the wall, as a source told The Sun, "This is a very sad situation — Adele and Simon had been living separate lives for some time. It was well known amongst their friends that this time they simply were not going to sort it out. They had been trying for years but eventually you have to accept that something just isn't going to work."

Motherhood was difficult for her

Possibly complicating Adele and Simon Konecki's relationship was her struggle with postpartum depression after the birth of their son, Angelo, in 2012. "It frightened me," she confessed to Vanity Fair, adding, "My knowledge of postpartum … is that you don't want to be with your child; you're worried you might hurt your child; you're worried you weren't doing a good job." She also admitted she felt a lot of pressure to have a child because so many of her friends were becoming mothers.

However, Adele's postpartum depression took on a different set of symptoms. "I was obsessed with my child," she said. "I felt very inadequate; I felt like I'd made the worst decision of my life … It can come in many different forms." She explained that she felt she needed more time for herself alone, and while Konecki encouraged her to talk to other mothers about it, she was extremely reluctant at first. However, when she did, she found that they were in the same boat.

In addition to struggling with the idea of having a moment to herself, Adele suffers from extreme mom guilt when she's on the road. She explained, "I'm enjoying touring, but at times I feel guilty because I'm doing this massive tour, and even though my son is with me all the time, on certain nights I can't put him to bed. I never feel guilty when I'm not working."

She may have wanted another child

Despite her struggles with motherhood, Adele previously hinted that she was interested in possibly having a sibling for Angelo. During an October 2016 concert in which she and Simon Konecki may or may not have been celebrating their fifth anniversary, she told the audience (via Entertainment Tonight), "My son is about to turn four very, very soon. I'm starting to get very emotional about it, because I feel like once they turn four, they're not really your actual baby anymore. So my womb is starting to ache a little bit. It's like, 'Baby, baby, baby. Need a baby, need a baby.' I'm not pregnant," she clarified, adding, "I won't get pregnant until the end of the tour."

However, two months later, she told Vanity Fair that Konecki's daughter from his previous marriage was her "get out jail free card" in terms of avoiding having another child if she felt too overwhelmed to do so.

The split may have been brewing for a while

Despite the seemingly sudden separation announcement, insiders say that Adele and Simon Konecki had likely been done for a while before the rest of the world found about it. Radar Online reported that Adele signed one of the couple's Los Angeles homes over to Konecki on Jan. 24, 2019, almost a full three months before they revealed their marriage was over. The couple still share a home in Beverly Hills, as well as other properties in London and Brighton, England. Insiders told The Daily Mail that Adele and Konecki will likely raise son Angelo in the U.K., where he'll reportedly attend school. The outlet also reported that Adele and Konecki were rumored to have split as early as 2014 with Konecki moving out of their shared home and into his own Brighton bachelor pad, but that Adele denied it.

As for reports that Konecki may be entitled to half of Adele's estimated $194 million fortune, those close to the estranged couple doubt he's a golddigger. A source told The Daily Mail that the split is unlikely to get nasty, however, explaining of former investment banker turned philanthropist Konecki, "Simon's not like that. He's got his own money. His only concern now is that he and Adele remain the best parents they can be to Angelo."

She's excited to date again

Adele is reportedly eager to get back into the dating game following her split from her husband. However, just because she and Simon Konecki have separated doesn't mean she's in a hurry to find a man to put a ring on it again. Insiders claim that Adele is interested in finding new men to date, especially Americans, as she spends more time in the U.S. A source told The Sun, "She's been excited speaking to men again. She is very much in the courting phase. She's attracted to other men and accepts it is over with Simon for good this time — there is no going back. She has asked friends to look out for potential dates. She doesn't want to rush or get into something too serious too soon. But in reality this was a marriage where the romantic love ended many years ago."

Adele hinted to concert audience in Brisbane, Australia, in 2017 (via The Mirror) that she may have missed her single days. "I was trying to remember how it was I felt at the beginning of the relationship that inspired that record," she said. "That feeling when you first fall for someone is the best feeling on earth, and I am addicted to that feeling … Obviously, I can't go through with those feelings because I'm married now."