The Real Reason Paulina Porizkova Still Cries Every Day Over Her Ex

She was an international model. He was an international rock star. Married in 1989, Paulina Porizkova and The Cars' lead singer Ric Ocasek were a hot celebrity couple. According to Page Six, they had two sons together before separating in 2017. Two years later, Ocasek died suddenly from heart disease and pulmonary emphysema.

Page Six reports that Porizkova herself found Ocasek dead in the Manhattan townhouse they shared despite their separation. The next day, she learned that Ocasek had shockingly cut her out of his will just weeks before. "I have made no provision for my wife ... as we are in the process of divorcing," he wrote. "Even if I should die before our divorce is final ... Paulina is not entitled to any elective share ... because she has abandoned me." This left her in an unpleasant financial situation due to her never signing a prenup.

"I got two mortgaged houses and the pension, but no way to pay for anything," she said in an interview (via Page Six). "So obviously things had to be sold, but until they got sold, I had nothing to live on. I literally went through a year of asking my friends to buy us groceries. It was not a good position to be in."

Although she suffered after her partner's death and is now dating Aaron Sorkin, Porizkova revealed she still cries every day over Ocasek's death. But why?

Paulina Porizkova is still grieving

In an Instagram post on May 3, 2021, Paulina Porizkova posted a clip of an interview she did with Yahoo! with a long caption in which she opened up about her past two years of grieving. "I know it looks like my life is now perfect; living in a lovely apartment, just featured on the cover of Vogue, attending the Oscars with my man ... I'm immensely grateful for all the new and beautiful gifts I'm receiving from life," she wrote. "And yet, I still cry. Almost every day."

She continued to bare her soul in the interview clip. "It felt like I was missing an arm or a leg," she said. "Without him, I had lost half of my identity." Interestingly, Porizkova revealed she believes she was left out Ric Ocasek's will by "mistake," and that he would have changed it had he not died suddenly. "And that's not his fault," she said. "And I'm going to choose to go with that because there's no one to tell me any different" (via Page Six).

Although their relationship had its troubles, it's clear Porizkova had — and still has — a deep love for her late husband. "Broken hearts don't mend easily or quickly," she wrote on Instagram. "But they do mend.