Tragic Details About Lindsey Graham & His Sister Darline's Life Are Heartbreaking

Lindsey Graham's bachelor lifestyle has long been a subject of intrigue. For many years, some have speculated that the Senator from South Carolina is gay, though Graham has consistently denied the rumors about his homosexuality. Despite his unmarried status and the persistent speculation about Graham's love life, the Republican politician has long defended that he is a family man through and through. He may not have a wife and children, but he has his little sister, Darline Graham Nordone.

Graham and Nordone have always had a tight bond. Growing up in a blue-collar family with parents who worked long hours, Graham (who is nearly a decade older than Nordone) played an important role in his sister's upbringing. "Lindsey was kind of the one there that took care of me. If I fell down and scraped my knee, Lindsey was the one I ran to," she told The State in 2014. That dynamic only intensified as they faced life's tragedies together.

Concrete proof of their bond came in 2015 when Graham announced he would run for president in the 2016 elections. Because he had no wife, he often had to answer questions regarding the first lady position — and Nordone was on his mind. "Well, I've got a sister, she could play that role if necessary," he told the Daily Mail, before jokingly offering another solution. "I've got a lot of friends. We'll have a rotating first lady." Graham and Nordone's relationship may sound peculiar, but their bond stems from a tough childhood.

Raised in rural South Carolina, Lindsey and Darline Graham grew up amid scarcity. Their parents were high school dropouts who ran a business — or rather, businesses — to put food on the table. F.J. and Millie Graham started out with a bar-slash-restaurant, later acquiring the liquor store next door and adding a pool hall downstairs. Named Sanitary Café, it served as the one-stop-shop for exhausted mill workers after their grueling shifts. Keeping it afloat was hard work, and F.J. and Millie couldn't do it alone.

At 12 years old, Lindsey rolled up his sleeves and set out to help. "I ran the pool hall. I've heard every story and then some," he told The Washington Post in 1998. Things weren't much easier back home. "It could not be more small town and more humble when it comes to how we were brought up," Darline told CNN when Lindsey announced his presidential bid in June 2015. Darline gave a tour of where they lived (seen above), which was a single room behind the bar. "It was one room, where we all slept, we all ate, we watched TV, the sofa, everything was in one room," she explained. 

It wasn't easy, but Lindsey has a lot of appreciation for his upbringing. In many ways, it taught him important life lessons. "It was a great place to learn about life. I had wives call up wanting to know if their husband's there and I'm answering the phone at 9 years of age," he told The Washington Post. 

Lindsey Graham had recently left home for the University of South Carolina when Millie Graham was diagnosed with stage 4 Hodgkin's lymphoma, a type of blood cancer that affects the lymphatic system. She was given six months to live. Then 21, Lindsey rushed home to be with his family. Darline Graham was just 12. 

Being nine years older than his sister, Lindsey had often played a parental role in her life, but this time he felt the burden of responsibility when he had to tell her the bad news. "Lindsey took me to the end of the hall [at the hospital]," Darline told The New York Times in 2021. "He told me he didn't know if she was going to make it." She didn't, but it wasn't straightforward. When the doctor first told them Millie had died, Lindsey refused to accept it. He grabbed her arms and "pleaded with her to come to us. And she did. She revived," he wrote in his 2016 autobiography, "My Story" (via Politico).

But she went on to live just another week. This time, Lindsey accepted her fate. "She talked about heaven and told me, Lindsey, let me go," he recalled. Millie was 52. Around the same time Millie received her terminal diagnosis, F.J. Graham was diagnosed with prostate cancer. It was a very hard time for the Grahams, and, unfortunately, easier times were not yet on the horizon. 

A little over a year after their mother died, Lindsey and Darline Graham faced the unexpected death of their father as well. It wasn't prostate cancer, but rather a heart attack. Making the event even more tragic, a 13-year-old Darline was the one who discovered him. "I can remember the day my father passed away standing in the living room of that house absolutely scared to death," she said on NPR's "Weekend Edition Sunday" in 2015.

Lindsey rushed to their hometown as soon as he could to be with her. "Lindsey wrapped his arms around me and promised me he would always be there for me and always take care of me," she continued. The death of their parents within 15 months of each other ignited a tumultuous time in their lives. Darline went to live with their aunt and uncle in nearby Seneca, South Carolina while Lindsey was away in college. He came home every weekend to be with Darline and tend to the family business.

But it was all too much for the young Lindsey Graham. "You could see that the business was going down because he wasn't there all the time to make it a growing concern," his childhood friend, Thomas Von Kaenel, told CNN in 2016. He eventually sold the Sanitary Café and joined the Air Force, but he never stopped taking care of his sister. In fact, he went all in.

Even though Darline Graham continued to live with relatives, Lindsey Graham legally adopted his sister to become her legal guardian. This gave him the ability to take out college loans on her behalf and ensure she would qualify for his Air Force benefits as his dependent. "At first the idea was a little odd but I was like, you know, it makes perfect sense and I just trusted his judgment, I knew he was doing what was best for us," Darline said in the 2016 CNN feature.

Lindsey took his role as guardian rather seriously. He went home every Friday and stayed through Sunday, making sure that his teenage sister stayed in line. "I was probably a nut. I never let her date. I smelled her clothes if she smoked. I listened in on her phone calls," he said in the 1998 interview with The Washington Post. He realizes now that his methods were a bit harsh, but Lindsey did what he thought was best.

After all, he was a 22-year-old college student completely unprepared to raise a teenager. "I was probably pressing too hard, just 'cause I felt such responsibility for her," he said. In hindsight, Darline appreciates that he was there for her even though she wanted to experience adolescence on her own terms. "I was the rebellious teenager and he was always very strict with me," she said. He regrets his approach now but is thankful it all worked out. "She's turned out great in spite of me," he said.

Lindsey and Darline Graham's parents may not have earned a lot, but what they earned was precious. The siblings felt the absence of every penny after Millie and F.J. Graham died, particularly Lindsey, who was responsible for raising and getting his sister through college. "I struggled financially and emotionally," he said in his presidential bid announcement (via CNN). They managed, but Lindsey learned that everyone — no matter how hard working — might need a little help.

Lindsey and Darline depended on government benefits to get by as he finished his education and started earning money. When he ran for president, Graham made keeping Social Security benefits afloat an important part of his campaign promises. "As President, I'll gladly do what it takes to save a program that once helped my family," said the then-presidential candidate (via Time), whose proposed reforms included raising the retirement age for workers and raising income cutoffs.

A month later, Lindsey defended social programs again using his personal experience to illustrate the importance of a robust safety network in place for working Americans. "I'm a proud Republican but there's a time and a place for the government," he said before a Republican crowd (via Daily Mail). "I've been on my knees and some people helped me get up." Lindsey pointed out that without loans, he wouldn't have been able to send Darline to college, something he's very proud of. "I felt very happy to have done it. She is the light of my life," he told The Washington Post.