Hollywood Relationships That Seemed Completely Fake

Even the strongest of Hollywood couples can struggle to go the distance. Between all the gossip and the harsh glare of the spotlight, mundane problems can be perceived as scandalous, which can easily take a toll on a relationship. That said, when a star-studded romance is about as genuine as a politician's promise, it's easy to call BS. 

Sometimes the red flags of fakery are easy to find, like Jennifer Lopez and Drake playing coy with loved-up social media snaps right before they released a track together. Other times, these possibly lying lovers' clues are harder to sniff out, such as Henry Cavill and Kaley Cuoco sharing a high-powered PR firm, or whatever the arrangement was between Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes that seemed to have an impenetrable Scientology firewall around it. Let's explore those pairings and more with our list of Hollywood relationships that were (in our humble opinion) completely fake. 

The Big Bunk Relationship Theory

As Man of Steel came out in 2013, Superman actor Henry Cavill started dating Kaley Cuoco. Their brief relationship had plenty of middle school-style PDA and visits to a popular L.A. farmer's market, where the paparazzi notoriously hang out. Although, according to Cuoco, she just couldn't believe all the attention she was getting. 

"I had no one following me until I met Superman. I've been in this business for 20 years, and my whole life, I could go anywhere, do anything. There had not been one paparazzi photo of me until like seven months ago," she told Cosmopolitan. That's clearly stretching the truth. Cuoco was already the hugely recognizable star of The Big Bang Theory, while Cavill was actually a relative unknown before donning the red cape and parading about with Cuoco by his side.

Their highly publicized fling lasted only weeks, and adding fuel to the just-for-PR fire was the fact that Cuoco and Cavill were both represented by the same public relations firm. Sure, that's not so unusual in Hollywood, but Cuoco's faster-than-a-speeding-bullet approach to love is, considering she immediately moved on to tennis pro Ryan Sweeting and married him three months later. That union has since gone kaput, and Cuoco has already remarried again. As for her and Cavill? Had that been real, she would have secured that lockdown faster than you could say, "Look, up in the sky... it's a bird! It's a plane! No... it's Kaley Cuoco's fake boyfriend!"

Age is just a... huge indicator of this phony relationship

Reality star Courtney Stodden married The Green Mile actor Doug Hutchison when she was 16 and he was 51. According to ABC News, they met when Stodden became interested in Hutchison's acting workshop, so not only could he be her dad, he was also her mentor. Their love blossomed over email, which was monitored by Stodden's mother, Krista, who allegedly told the actor, "I can feel my daughter's love for you ... and I can feel your love for her. So rest assured: Me and Alex [Courtney's dad], we have absolutely no problem with you two falling in love." With her parents' approval, and "no sexual emails and no physical contact," Hutchison dove headfirst into the romance, because that sounds like that start of a genuine love story, right? 

Perhaps unsurprisingly, things only got weirder as their relationship issues played out — where else? — on reality TV. They even trotted out the old "leaked adult tape" chestnut to keep their headlines relevant (which somehow *wink* lead to a deal with a distributor). Both before and after that, the dubious duo separated, but kept living together, because real couples love a front-row seat to their SO's rebound romances. Still not convinced? After they finally split for good in 2017, Hutchison told the Daily Mail, "Courtney is addicted to Hollywood ... I don't think Courtney wants to be married." Ugh, why do we feel like this still isn't the last we'll hear from these two? 

When Kim and Kris called it quits real quick

Reality mogul Kim Kardashian has become more and more of a mainstream celeb over the years, but there was a time when everything she did had a strong air of publicity stunt to it. There was perhaps no bigger example than her suspiciously brief marriage to basketball pro Kris Humphries. Not only was their wedding captured, of course, in a grand televised spectacle in August 2011, but the union hit the bricks just 72 days after the vows. In a reaction statement (via People) after the divorce news broke, Humphries said, "I love my wife and am devastated to learn she filed for divorce." Sounds like at least one of them bought into the whole "Fairytale Wedding" storyline.

Kardashian, on the other hand, seemed to have the drama planned accordingly. With her marriage on the skids and all of it already captured on the yet-to-be-aired Season 6 of Keeping up with the Kardashians, she told People, "It will probably be the best season yet." Maybe the perpetual self-promoter, who has moved on to third husband Kanye West, was trying to make the best out of a bad situation, or maybe she married a guy on TV to boost her show's ratings and reportedly make $2 million on the whole thing? Either way, we have just one question: How iron-clad is your pre-nup, Yeezy?

Marriage: Impossible

Action star Tom Cruise didn't even have to dent Oprah's couch for people to question his marriage to Katie Holmes, although his talk show tomfoolery certainly didn't help matters. Cruise and Holmes dated for just two months before he proposed at the top of the Eiffel Tower in a cliché so perfect we only hope the ring was baked into a soufflé.

But Cruise wasn't the only one prone to excessive displays of infatuation, which let's be honest, are usually a cover-up for something. In a bizarre W magazine interview soon after their engagement — and during which a Scientology chaperone accompanied her — Holmes gushed, "[Tom] is the most incredible man. He's so generous and kind, and he helps so many people, and, um, he makes me laugh like I've never laughed, and he's a great friend." Could Shakespeare have described love better? Holmes' pregnancy was announced four months after the proposal, and they wed approximately one year after that in an Italian castle.

Shrouded in Scientology secrecy, their marriage was plagued with bizarre rumors, including one that their daughter, Suri, was actually church founder L. Ron Hubbard's biological child, conceived using his frozen sperm. TomKat split after six years, which some speculated was actually the term of a marriage contract that included bonuses for Holmes if she had more kids. Not bad work if you can get it, but not exactly the kind of Nicholas Sparks "dying together while holding hands" romance we were supposed to believe.

Thanks for the kids. Here's a house

Michael Jackson married his dermatologist's nurse, Debbie Rowe, shortly after his divorce from Lisa Marie Presley (another questionable marriage we won't get into). Rowe and Jackson had two kids together during their three-year marriage, which ended with her handing over full custodial rights in exchange for a Beverly Hills mansion and a huge chunk of change. Rowe actually told ABC News that she only wanted to bear the King of Pop's children as a gift to him because she believed "there are people who should be parents, and he's one of them." In the hearings when Rowe relinquished custody of both kids, she also said, "I did it for him to become a father, not for me to become a mother. You earn the title parent. I have done absolutely nothing to earn that title," so she literally couldn't have been more open about this faux love affair.

If she was basically just being paid as a surrogate, why go through the charade of getting married, right? Rowe told ABC News it was "to prevent some of the taboo of a child out of wedlock," because that was somehow a concern, yet the inevitable news stories about a mother essentially trading her kids for money and real estate was no big deal.

Were they really just ... friends?

Coming off the heels of her ugly separation from Fight Club star Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston found herself conveniently in the arms of her co-star from The Break-Up, Vince Vaughn. And just in time to promote their movie! Curiously, they took forever to confirm their relationship and somehow managed to keep a super-low public profile, rarely being photographed together, despite being two of the biggest stars in the business.

Long after the relationship ended, Vaughn told Playboy (via news.com.au), "For me personally — and I think most well-known actors who are together feel this way — I never enjoyed the paparazzi side of it. You like someone and you're spending time with them; that's separate and that was all fine." Wait, so Vaughn actually used the phrase "that was all fine" when talking about dating the Jennifer Aniston? Whew! Is it getting hot in here or is the passion of that description melting the internet? They called it quits after a year, or in industry terms, "just until the rental and DVD sales start to dip."

They were all just airplay for Tay-Tay

Songstress Taylor Swift's reputation for ex-shaming in her lyrics is legendary. That is, if your idea of a legend is a self-proclaimed "nightmare dressed like a daydream" (actual lyrics) who will profit off of your trampled heart. Here's a sampling of her "long list of ex-lovers" (more actual lyrics) who allegedly inspired songs: Jake Gyllenhaal, John Mayer, Harry Styles, Joe Jonas, and two guys named Drew. It begs the question: Does Swift, like, ever date anyone not for the story? Looking at you, Calvin Harris

But perhaps Swift's most laughably transparent relationship was with The Avengers actor Tom Hiddleston. This one included what appeared to be canned photoshoots of the lovebirds lounging on rocks and gazing lovingly at each other and the ocean. A lot of people speculated the whole thing was part of Hiddleston's attempt to raise his profile enough to be considered for the role of James Bond, but we're 100 percent certain that plan backfired the second he went swimming in his "I Heart T.S." tank top. Though their split was said to be "amicable," we're honestly shocked it didn't result in another Billboard heartbreak chart-topper, titled "Never Say Never Again (Unless You're Talking About Your Chances at Ever Playing James Bond. Seriously, What Were You Thinking with that Shirt?)"

Seacrest out?

Ryan Seacrest and dancer Julianne Hough were together for three years before enduring a breakup that was allegedly caused by them never seeing each other. Hough confessed to Glamour (via Us Weekly) that she's a workaholic, and everyone knows how much Seacrest does since it's nearly impossible to turn on a TV or radio and not see or hear him. Consequently, we're assuming these two had a romance of convenience that ended up being not so convenient. As far as them being a "fake couple," that was mostly from a story about Seacrest buying Hough a $3 million house as a "parting gift," but that turned out to be fake as well.

But hang on, because another one of Seacrest's exes may have a clue as to how real any of his romances have been. Having dated stunners such as Victoria's Secret Angel Adriana Lima and Playboy Playmate Sara Jean Underwood, Seacrest seems like a modern day Casanova, yet his relationships are so mysterious that rampant speculation about his sexuality has filled in the gaps. Underwood did him no favors when she told shock jock Howard Stern that over the course of their "sporadic" two year relationship, they never had sex. She also said, "He accepts the fact that he's sort of, like, feminine ... I kissed him. That's it." Yeesh. Look, we're absolutely not here to judge, but if Hough's relationship with Seacrest was handled like a Duggar family first date, it's no wonder it didn't work out.

Real or fake, this was a disaster

The root of Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian's relationship is an odd Jerry Springer-esq connection Chyna has to Kardashian's half-sister, Kylie Jenner, and Jenner's ex, rapper Tyga. Have a headache yet? Well, take an aspirin because Chyna now has children with both Tyga and Kardashian, so if both couples had married (don't worry, it's never happening now), that would have made King Cairo (Tyga and Chyna's son) a stepbrother and step-cousin to Dream (Kardashian and Chyna's daughter). It would have also made Kardashian both a stepfather and step-uncle to King Cairo, essentially turning their family tree into a tumbleweed. But aside from that, how authentic was potential Uncle Daddy Kardashian and Aunt Mommy Chyna's relationship?

First off, Chyna (Real name: Angela Renée White) tried to "trademark 'Angela Renée Kardashian' to use while working in entertainment" (per People) soon after she and Kardashian hooked up. Second, the duo quickly spun its romance into a reality show, so the whiff of shenanigans shrouding this love affair was strong. Third, after giving birth to Dream, Chyna reportedly bolted from the house she and Kardashian lived in only to chalk the whole thing up to "her Instagram getting hacked." That brings us full circle to the absolute nightmare of revenge porn, abuse accusations, and PFAs that marked their painfully awkward breakup. Real or fake, the whole thing made for drama that was the stuff of reality TV producers' dreams, which we feel like says it all.

Wait, something Steve-O did was gross? No...

Back when she was a reality TV pioneer on The Simple Life from 2003 to 2007, Nicole Richie briefly hooked up with Jackass star Steve-O, creating what seemed like a match made in reality TV heaven (or hell, depending on how you view it). In 2006, both were desperately clinging to their burgeoning fame, so Richie allegedly cooked up the phony romance just for paparazzi attention.

The always classy Steve-O spilled the beans on the whole charade during a 2006 interview with Howard Stern (via Kiss Kiss & All That!). He offered some gross details that we won't get into here except to say that only he consummated the relationship — with himself while Richie slept in bed next to him. Yeah. So, not only was this not a marriage-track pairing from the start, Steve-O flat out called the whole thing "a big publicity stunt," right down to Richie allegedly phoning the paparazzi to stage ambushes of them in public. I [wanted] to be in the tabloids!" he told Stern. "I f***in' loved it. I have no hard feelings. I don't think she has any hard feelings for me." 

Call us crazy, but she probably didn't love finding out about his self-love sessions we mentioned back there. Anyway, if there's anything admirable about this counterfeit courtship, it's that they basically owned up to it right away. Even so, we still feel like we could use a nice, long shower right about now.

Well, this is one way to promote a single

Was it a hot fling? Or just one giant internet troll? That's what people are still wondering about Drake and Jennifer Lopez's alleged hookup, which, according to People, reportedly lasted only a few months from late 2016 to early 2017, but dominated tabloid headlines in Hollywood. Of course, the rumored couple did very little to squash the rumors, often appearing in cuddly posts on Instagram without offering much explanation. Only later, when Lopez confirmed she was making music with Drake, did people begin to roll their eyes.

Lopez continued to play coy through February 2017, when she admitted to "hanging out" with Drake on Ellen. But by March 2017, she had apparently had enough, telling The Daily Show's Trevor Noah (via InStyle) that she was "not with Drake." So, why did Lopez finally decide to put this rumor to bed? People also reported that Lopez was linked to New York Yankees icon Alex Rodriguez — who she's still dating, as of this writing — the day after The Daily Show interview aired. Which, hmmm.

Twilight drained the life out of Robsten

Maybe it was because they always looked so miserable on the red carpet. Maybe it was because they were the stars of the biggest movie franchise in years. Whatever the case, tabloids speculated for years that Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson's relationship was nothing more than great PR for the uber-successful Twilight Saga movies. Pattinson laughed off the suggestion to The Washington Post in 2012, the year the franchise ended. He said, "[His relationship with Stewart] would be a terrible marketing tool, and it's not utilized very well at all." That same year, Stewart was caught cheating on Pattinson with her married Snow White and the Huntsman director, Rupert Sanders.

According to People, the pair split up briefly after that, then for good about a year later. Curiously, one of Pattinson's only public remarks about the infidelity was, "S**t happens, you know? It's just young people it's normal! And honestly, who gives a s**t?" Does that sound like the genuine reaction of a heartbroken lover? Perhaps even more curiously, Stewart looked back on everything with even more dubious sentiment. "People wanted me and Rob to be together so badly that our relationship was made into a product," she told T magazine in 2016. "It wasn't real life anymore. And that was gross to me." So, their love was real, but people's love of their love eventually made it fake? Sure, let's go with that. 

Wait, did she not actually think his tractor was sexy?

Of all the random celebrity hookups over the years, few have raised more eyebrows than Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney, who eloped suddenly in May 2005, only to divorce a few months later, when Zellweger cited the now-infamous "fraud" in her papers. In a statement to People, Zellweger quickly clarified that "the term 'fraud' as listed in the documentation is simply legal language and not a reflection of Kenny's character."

Still, that didn't stop the tabloids from wondering whether that confirmed the rumors that Chesney was actually gay. Speaking to the Advocate in 2016, Zellweger revealed that the gossip made her very upset for Chesney. "It made me sad that somehow people were using that as a way to be cruel and calling someone gay as a pejorative, which has fateful consequences," she said. "Of course, there's the bigger-picture problem of why anyone had to make up a story at all." And yet, she also admitted she "forgot about that," reigniting speculation that the whole marriage was indeed a fraud. "It's a pretty big thing to forget, isn't it?" she said. No kidding. 

It might sound crazy, but it ain't no lie

Young love can be intense, dramatic, and complicated, especially when one of the people in the relationship is coming to grips with their sexuality. Enter Lance Bass and Danielle Fishel. While the two dated for about a year, attended Fishel's prom together, and said "I love you" to each other, even Bass has admitted their relationship became a sign that he needed to, you know, come out of the closet.

Recalling his decision not to take Fishel's virginity on Valentine's Day, Bass told Tyra Banks, "I knew I was gay. To me, I loved her, as much as I knew what love was; this is what love was. That's when I knew I was totally gay and I didn't want to do that to someone, you know? And when she told me she was a virgin and everything — and at that point I had had sex with a woman — I was like ... I can't be that first person for you and [know later on that I will] eventually come out."

Of course, Bass' very believable description of his love for Fishel means we know this entry comes with a bit of an asterisk, but in a sea of depressing sham relationships, we felt a bright spot wouldn't hurt. Even better, Bass — who came out in 2006 and later married Michael Turchin — remained close friends with Fishel. Come on, that is kind of the best ending ever.