Why '70s Icon Pam Grier Never Married Or Had Kids (Despite Her Many A-List Romances)

The following includes references to suicide and substance use.

Pam Grier counts the likes of NBA star Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Richard Pryor, and Freddie Prinze as past loves, but the star notably never married, nor did she have children. However, the actor has said that despite once wanting those things, she believes she didn't settle down for a reason.

Grier's dating history is star-studded to say the least, and she certainly did come close to marriage a few times. Notably, Abdul-Jabbar told her on a number of occasions that he wanted to marry her in the late 1960s and early '70s. However, he wasn't just asking her to commit to him, but also his new religion, Islam. So committed was he to his new faith that Grier called him and Islam "one and the same" in her memoir, "Foxy: My Life in Three Acts." Ultimately, she described all the back and forth as a "roller coaster," and shared that despite loving each other, they couldn't get past their different beliefs. The relationship finally ended when Abdul-Jabbar gave Grier an ultimatum to commit to him and converting, or that he'd marry someone else the very same day. He went ahead with that marriage, and Grier wrote, "I was shattered by the breakup, although I must have known it was inevitable." Even so, she added that for a while she stopped reading magazines like Jet and Ebony, which regularly covered her ex. 

Grier came close to marriage again in the late '90s thanks to her engagement to music exec Kevin Evans. Speaking to Jet in 1998, she gushed that they were hoping to become parents, while Evans revealed that she was close with his children from a previous marriage. However, Grier and Evans never married, with Grier writing in "Foxy" that her fiance (whom she called "Caleb" in the book) became obsessed with fame and money after her career resurgence. 

In addition to her relationships that nearly led to marriage and babies, Pam Grier has also spoken about Freddie Prinze wanting to have children with her. However, she wrote in "Foxy" that she had a few reservations. For one, she explained, both of their careers were hugely successful, and she knew that if they did have kids, one of them would have to put theirs on the back burner. However, she was also concerned about Prinze's drug use and mental health. "How could I bring a child into the world with a parent as unstable as Freddie? I couldn't do it to a child and I couldn't do it to myself," she wrote. As many know, Prinze was one of many 1970s stars who met a tragic fate, and though he did welcome his son, Freddie Prinze Jr., with his wife Kathy Prinze in 1976, he died by an apparent suicide just under a year later. 

Ultimately, Grier never did welcome children of her own, and she admitted in "Foxy" that she had mixed feelings about that. "I thought that by now I would have a husband, some wonderful children, and an Ivy League education. These were my dreams, but the fact that they did not come true does not discourage me," she wrote. She added, "To be perfectly honest, some days I feel like I missed out on having children and creating my own nuclear family. On other days, I'm so overwhelmed with writing, acting and caring for my home and my animals, I wonder how I would ever manage having children."

As for marriage, she mused in a 2024 appearance on "CBS Sunday Morning" that it not happening was likely for the best. "Maybe my husband, partner, mate, was filmmaking," she smiled.

If you or anyone you know needs help with addiction issues or is struggling or in crisis, contact the relevant resources below:

• Visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website or contact SAMHSA's National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).
• Call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.