Stars Who've Suffered From A Pregnancy Loss
Experiencing pregnancy loss can be devastating for everyone involved, but those who have gone through it are certainly not alone. According to WebMD, "about 15%-25% of recognized pregnancies will end in a miscarriage," with upwards of "50% of all pregnancies" ending in miscarriage, though many of those are before a woman is aware she is pregnant.
Regardless of the exact circumstances, this means that pregnancy loss has most likely impacted you or someone you know at some point in their lives. And unfortunately, there have been a variety of negative stigma and shame associated with miscarriage and pregnancy loss throughout history.
Many celebs have spoken out and shared their own emotional experiences with miscarriages in hopes of shifting the dialogue — or lack thereof — surrounding pregnancy loss. They've shared their heart wrenching stories in interviews, on social media, and even through their work, to make sure that families who experience this kind of loss know that they aren't alone. So let's take a look at some of these brave stars who have shared their stories. And if you or someone you know is suffering with grief associated with pregnancy loss or infertility, feel free to click here for additional resources.
Meghan Markle wrote a moving essay about her experience with pregnancy loss
Meghan Markle and Prince Harry have always done things their own way compared to the rest of the royal family, and Meghan unprecedentedly sharing her experience with pregnancy loss was no different. In November 2020, Markle penned an emotional op-ed piece for the The New York Times titled, "The Losses We Share." In the piece, Markle explained that she was pregnant during the summer of 2020, but she miscarried while she was at home with her and Prince Harry's first child, Archie.
She then detailed her experience in the hospital, remembering how she held Harry's hand. "I felt the clamminess of his palm and kissed his knuckles, wet from both our tears," Meghan wrote, adding, "Staring at the cold white walls, my eyes glazed over. I tried to imagine how we'd heal." Meghan also revealed how this experience, on top of everything else that happened in 2020, made her and Harry feel "more alone than ever," and yet somehow simultaneously "connected ... because of all we have individually and collectively endured this year." Her main goal with the essay was not only personal catharsis, but also an invitation "to share our pain" in order to "take the first steps toward healing."
The Duchess of Sussex poignantly concluded the piece by posing the question, "Are we OK?" and offering the simple, yet hopeful answer, "We will be."
Chrissy Teigen faced controversy for sharing photos from her miscarriage
In October 2020, Chrissy Teigen shared an emotional post about miscarrying her and her husband John Legend's third child together. Teigen revealed on Instagram that she had serious pregnancy complications that required multiple blood transfusions and days in the hospital. Sadly, their son Jack didn't make it, and Teigen shared a series of emotional photos from the gut wrenching experience on Instagram. Alongside the photos, Teigen wrote, "We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about, the kind of pain we've never felt before. ... To our Jack – I'm so sorry that the first few moments of your life were met with so many complications, that we couldn't give you the home you needed to survive. We will always love you."
And despite everything Teigen, Legend, and their entire family endured, Teigen received waves of backlash for sharing photos from her miscarriage experience. But Teigen did what Teigen does best, she clapped back at the haters in a raw, personal essay posted on Medium. I cannot express how little I care that you hate the photos," she wrote, adding, "How little I care that it's something you wouldn't have done. I lived it, I chose to do it, and more than anything, these photos aren't for anyone but the people who have lived this... These photos are only for the people who need them. The thoughts of others do not matter to me."
Christina Perri's daughter was 'born silent'
Singer Christina Perri has always been open about her experiences with pregnancy loss. In January 2020, she revealed on Twitter that she was heartbroken over losing her baby at 11 weeks. "When the time is right, we will try again," she promised. Perri and her husband Paul Costabile did try again, and she shared on social media that she was pregnant once again with their "rainbow baby."
Unfortunately though, Perri revealed in November 2020 that they lost that baby girl who was due to arrive in January. According to Us Weekly, Perri was hospitalized for pregnancy complications and ended up losing her baby in her third trimester. This is extremely uncommon, according to WebMD, which notes that "more than 80% of miscarriages happen within the first 3 months of pregnancy."
Perri shared the tragic news with her fans on Instagram alongside a solemn photo of her holding their baby girl's tiny hand. Perri wrote, "Last night we lost our baby girl. She was born silent after fighting so hard to make it to our world. She is at peace now and will live forever in our hearts." Perri's comments were flooded with love and support fans and fellow celebs, including artist Sarah Coleman, who wrote, "You are going through the unthinkable so you can guide other women through the same. Your beautiful baby will love through your heart forever. You are a light for so many. Keep speaking your truth. Love you."
Jade Roper Tolbert lost the baby she conceived while filming Bachelor in Paradise
Bachelor stars Jade Roper Tolbert and Tanner Tolbert welcomed third child in November 2020, but the journey to their family of five wasn't as perfect as it may have looked on social media. In an emotional video posted to YouTube in February 2019, the Tolbert's revealed that Jade got pregnant during the 2015 season of Bachelor in Paradise. The pregnancy came shortly after they first fell in love on the show, but it sadly ended in a miscarriage. "You always hear those stories about those couples that get pregnant the very first time they have sex," Tanner said, adding, "I never thought that would be me, but it was. Add on top of that it happened on a TV show — in a Fantasy Suite — made things a little complicated."
Jade also shared, "At the time, I didn't really grieve, because I just didn't really know how to process it. It was so much so fast." The day after publishing the YouTube video, Jade shared why she waited three years to open up about the miscarriage on Instagram. "I was honestly so scared to share our story, because I have always had this inner voice that's said I don't matter as much, especially when it comes to my struggles or my pain. ... I've been keeping this weight for a long time, but being pregnant now again, all these emotions have been on the surface for me."
Reliving this 'uncomfortable' interview has to be painful for Mariah Carey
Most people know that 2020 was a tough year for Ellen DeGeneres amid reports of her show being a toxic workplace. And as all the DeGeneres drama unfolded, fans and media outlets resurfaced old, problematic interviews of hers. One of those was a 2008 interview in which where DeGeneres prodded Mariah Carey on baby rumors. Despite Carey dodging the question, DeGeneres kept trying to get a pregnancy confirmation. She even went as far as pouring the singer a glass of champagne and baited her into revealing the baby news. As the champagne was poured, a clearly uncomfortable Carey said, "I can't believe you did this to me, Ellen."
It was later revealed that Carey miscarried and kept it a secret until 2010 when she became pregnant with her twins, Monroe and Moroccan. In an August 2020 interview with Vulture, Carey said that DeGeneres left her feeling "extremely uncomfortable" when she was pressuring her to prematurely reveal her pregnancy on national television. Sadly, that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage soon after Carey's appearance on DeGeneres' show. Carey told Vulture, "I really have had a hard time grappling with the aftermath. I wasn't ready to tell anyone because I had had a miscarriage. I don't want to throw anyone that's already being thrown under any proverbial bus, but I didn't enjoy that moment."
Carrie Underwood suffered from three pregnancy losses in a two year span
In a 2018 interview with Sunday Morning, Carrie Underwood spoke about her and her husband Mike Fisher's experience having three miscarriages throughout 2017 and 2018. She said that despite the miscarriages, she didn't want to be angry or complain because she already felt so blessed to have a husband, child, and life that she loved. But in another interview with People, Underwood said that the miscarriages also forced her to have some tough conversations with God and made her feel like she wanted to give up at times. Underwood said, "Of course you wonder if it's you, what am I doing wrong, or what have I done wrong. I remember having conversations with Mike trying to make sense of it all."
Fisher and Underwood discussed the multiple heartbreaking miscarriages again in their 2020 religious docu-series Mike and Carrie: God & Country. On the show, the two talked about how just when Underwood thought she had lost yet another baby in a two year span, their doctor told her that the pregnancy was still viable. This pregnancy ended up leading to their rainbow baby, Jacob, who was born in January 2019. Underwood shared the news on Instagram that their son was born, thanking God, and calling Jacob a "little miracle."
Beyoncé had multiple miscarriages before Blue Ivy
Beyoncé and Jay-Z are notoriously private, but in a 2019 interview with Elle she got real about having not just one, but multiple miscarriages. Beyoncé spoke candidly about the multiple pregnancy losses she and Jay-Z experienced before the birth of their daughter Blue Ivy in 2012, and how this experience helped put her career in perspective. In response to a fan's question about getting snubbed by the Grammys for Lemonade, Beyoncé said, "I began to search for deeper meaning when life began to teach me lessons I didn't know I needed. Success looks different to me now. I learned that all pain and loss is in fact a gift. Having miscarriages taught me that I had to mother myself before I could be a mother to someone else."
Beyoncé also spoke about her miscarriages in a very personal 2013 interview with Oprah. In the interview, Beyoncé revealed that her experience with pregnancy loss made her become even more private when she eventually got pregnant with Blue Ivy, though she felt so fortunate and wanted to celebrate it. She said, "There are so many couples that go through that, and it was a big part of my story. ... It's one of the reasons I did not share I was pregnant the second time, because you don't know what's going to happen. And that was hard because all of my family and my friends knew and we celebrated. It was hard."
Shawn Johnson shared her fears about a pregnancy after a miscarriage
Olympic gold medalist Shawn Johnson and her husband Andrew East suffered a devastating miscarriage in 2017. The couple even captured the moment they found out about the loss in a heartbreaking YouTube video. Johnson later posted on Instagram that their "world was turned upside down" by the miscarriage. She felt guilty, as if she had done something wrong to cause the pregnancy loss, and that feeling was exactly why she felt like she needed to share their story with the world. Johnson told TODAY that, "It's so traumatic. I felt really lost. So, I took a leap of faith and shared it with the world. It's a topic that needs to be talked about more."
And that's not the only topic surrounding pregnancy loss that Johnson felt like needed to be discussed more honestly and openly. She and East got pregnant again, but Johnson said that her pregnancy after loss came with intense anxiety and fear. "It's such a different feeling the second time around because you want to be happy and you want to be celebrating and planning out this kid's life, but you don't know," she told TODAY. Johnson and East ended up welcoming their daughter Drew Hazel East in October 2019.
P!nk turned to music and therapy to help her process her miscarriages
On P!nk's album Hurts 2B Human, she sings openly about her struggles with anxiety and body insecurity. Specifically, her song "Happy" starts with the lyrics, "Since I was 17, I've always hated my body / and it feels like my body's hated me." In April 2019, P!nk explained to USA Today that her miscarriage inspired these emotional lyrics.
She said, "Actually at 17 I had a miscarriage. And I was going to have that child. But when that happens to a woman or a young girl, you feel like your body hates you and like your body is broken, and it's not doing what it's supposed to do. I've had several miscarriages since, so I think it's important to talk about what you're ashamed of, who you really are and the painful s**t. I've always written that way."
P!nk also got real with the outlet about how therapy has helped her process her miscarriages, but she didn't seek help until five years after her first pregnancy loss. The "Raise Your Glass" singer, who has been with the same therapist ever since, said, "I believe in self-confrontation and just getting things out. What I love about therapy is that they'll tell you what your blind spots are. Although that's uncomfortable and painful, it gives you something to work with."
No comedy material is off limits for Ali Wong
In 2019, Ali Wong told Health that she is open to covering all topics during her comedy routines, including her experience with miscarriage. Wong, who has two daughters, said she "didn't realize miscarrying was a thing that could happen," so she "told everybody" about her third pregnancy at a very early stage. Wong said, "I told the lady who cleans my house and when she found out I was seven weeks along, she told me I shouldn't be telling people. Now I know why — it's because then you have to tell everyone the bad news." For this reason, typically, people wait until after the first trimester to share their pregnancy news, when "the risk of a miscarriage drops dramatically," according to Parents.
Wong also shared with Health how she endured some "insensitive reactions" as people tried to figure out why the miscarriage happened, even though miscarriages are fairly common and typically have an unidentifiable cause. Wong said people would "ask if it's because you had sushi or you were performing too much. They want to point to some cause and don't realize how bad that makes you feel." While Wong said she was worried she would disappoint some family members by talking about her miscarriage onstage, no topics are off limits for her and it was important for her to break down the stigmas and bring light to this issue.
Michelle Obama tried to normalized miscarriages and infertility in her book
Michelle Obama helped soften the stigma around pregnancy loss and infertility in her book Becoming. Obama shared that she and her husband Barack Obama experienced pregnancy loss and struggled with fertility. Subsequently, the couple's two daughters, Sasha and Malia, were conceived via in vitro fertilization (IVF). "We were trying to get pregnant and it wasn't going well," the former first lady wrote, adding, "We had one pregnancy test come back positive, which caused us both to forget every worry and swoon with joy, but a couple of weeks later I had a miscarriage, which left me physically uncomfortable and cratered any optimism we felt."
In a 2018 interview about her book, Obama told ABC News, "I felt lost and alone, and I felt like I failed, because I didn't know how common miscarriages were, because we don't talk about them. We sit in our own pain, thinking that somehow we're broken." And so, Obama made it her point to talk about her pregnancy loss and IVF treatment in her book to normalize this experience that so many families go through.
Fortunately, advances in fertility medicine, including IVF, have helped many people achieve the dream of becoming parents. In fact, according to a 2018 Pew Research Study, 33 percent of American adults report that they or someone they know has used some type of fertility treatment in order to try to have a baby.