Why Joanna Moore's Daughter Tatum Is Estranged From Her Father
This article discusses addiction.
The environment Joanna Moore provided for her children to grow up in was anything but adequate. When Moore and Ryan O'Neal split in 1966, Tatum and Griffin O'Neal were still toddlers. When they were 5 and 4, Moore relocated them to a ranch in Reseda for a simpler life. But that's far from what happened. Moore struggled with addiction and mental health issues, which translated into neglect and abuse toward the children.
"In the grip of addiction, she virtually abandoned me and Griffin, leaving us in squalor — starving, shoeless, and ragged," Tatum described in her 2004 memoir, "A Paper Life." When 7-year-old Tatum went to live with Ryan in Malibu, she couldn't have been happier. "It was pretty good then," she told NBC News in 2004. Just a couple of years later, Tatum was making history as the youngest actor to win an Academy Award for the 1973 film "Paper Moon," sharing the screen with her father.
But the good days didn't last. Tatum eventually stopped speaking with Ryan — a reality that remained largely unchanged for two decades. Tatum didn't invite him to her 1986 wedding to John McEnroe, and by 2009, Ryan could barely recognize Tatum — so much so that he accidentally made a pass at her. "I was just trying to be funny with a strange Swedish woman, and it's my daughter. It's so sick," he told Vanity Fair. How did Ryan and Tatum go from their "Paper Moon" bond to that? They don't agree on the answer.
If you or anyone you know is struggling with addiction issues, help is available. Visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website or contact SAMHSA's National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).
Father and daughter give different reasons for estrangement
In his version of events, Ryan and Tatum O'Neal's relationship took a turn when he found new love. "We had once been close, but Tatum did not take well to the arrival of Farrah Fawcett in my life," Ryan penned in his 2012 book, "Both of Us." Though Ryan and Fawcett never married, they were in a relationship — off and on — between 1979 until she died in 2009. Tatum's feelings toward Fawcett certainly weren't bubbly, with the former child star admitting they were estranged for a decade.
"I never talked to Farrah, even when she was my step mom," she told Access Hollywood in 2002 (via Today). However, Tatum argues her relationship with her father was strained for years before he moved on with Fawcett. According to her, the issues between them started as a result of her performance in "Paper Moon." While Tatum earned an Oscar, Ryan wasn't nominated. "It sort of destroyed us," she said in her NBC News interview.
In "A Paper Life," Tatum gave insight into what she perceived as her father's jealousy over her success. "In the press, he played the doting father. But in his eyes, I read the truth: deep resentment that his own brilliant performance was being dismissed," she wrote. Considering Tatum has acknowledged her lack of enthusiasm for Fawcett, the truth is likely a combination of both factors — and others. "My dad made a lot of mistakes," Tatum told Piers Morgan on CNN in 2011.
Tatum and Ryan O'Neal reconciled later in life
Tatum O'Neal might not have been Farrah Fawcett's biggest fan, but she was still saddened to learn of her cancer diagnosis in 2006. "You don't want anyone to be sick. You certainly don't want your brother's mother to be sick with cancer," she told "Access Hollywood" in 2007 (via Today), referring to Ryan O'Neal and Fawcett's son, Redmond O'Neal. The news inspired Tatum to reach out to Fawcett. "When I heard that she was sick I made a trip. I was working in San Diego at the time and I made a trip out to L.A., drove my car and I visited her," she said.
Tatum attended Fawcett's funeral on June 30, 2009 — which is where Ryan inadvertently hit on her — though she still hadn't reconciled with her father then. The following September, Tatum and Ryan sat down for the first time in years — an event mediated by Tatum's son, Sean McEnroe. "He told me he's sorry," Tatum told People in 2010. "He's all I have in terms of family, and I needed him in my life. My dad was absolutely everything to me."
McEnroe celebrated a family reunion in September 2020, a moment he ranked among the most memorable of his life. "If the O'Neals can reconcile, truly anything is possible," he captioned an Instagram photo. Tatum, on her part, shared her love for Ryan when he died in December 2023. "Me & my kids loved you so much, daddy," he wrote on Instagram.