Kristi Noem's Pufferfish Lips Have Us Begging Her To Fire Her Plastic Surgeon

Kristi Noem's lips appear to grow ever bigger commensurate with her Donald Trump stanning. Noem's incessantly altering appearance has sparked boundless plastic surgery chatter — which is hardly surprising when you compare pre- and post-MAGA conversion pics of the Homeland Security head honcho. Noem's purported face filler obsession has resulted in serious overload, cranking up her overstuffed pillow face to jumbo marshmallow levels. Meanwhile, Noem's trout-pout lips have people creating parody vids in their thousands and screaming: "Step away from the syringe!" Not to mention scoring Noem the honor of an ego-eviscerating "South Park" skewering.

Kristi Noem before and after the Trump required Hope Hicks makeover. pic.twitter.com/xkuoibVJex

— Roger dorp (@Roger758) May 4, 2024

The South Dakota native has remained steadfastly tight-lipped (no pun intended) about chemically enhanced aesthetics. The only cosmetic work that Noem has copped to is dental, admitting in a blatant promo video for a Texan dental practice in March 2024 that "her new family" fixed the front teeth she'd knocked out during a bike wreck.

However, at this point, does anybody believe that Noem's radical transformation is au naturel? Maybe those willing to give her the benefit of the doubt think that she's been engaging in the Kylie Jenner lip challenge or has accidentally walked face-first into a nest of angry wasps. The social media armchair nip-tuckers certainly don't, especially the celeb ones. "There are false reports about Kristi Noem crying as she was grilled by Congress about her lack of qualifications. The truth: thanks to Botox, surgery and Elmer's Glue, Kristi is unable to cry, shut her eyes or wink without her lips exploding," the novelist and playwright Paul Rudnick posted on X.

Kristi Noem's lips overfloweth thanks to what appears to be a glut of filler that's left them looking more stuffed than a Thanksgiving turkey. Late-night hosts, netizens, lefty liberals, and beauty bloggers are fixated on Noem's mammoth mouth and her seeming needle embracement. Her pufferfish lips have (almost) overtaken the coverage of her crazed conspiracy theory propagation and unquenchable thirst for making 'Merican streets safe again by hunting down and dispatching illegal immigrants — criminal or not.

However, instead of feeling relief over the respite from the ceaseless bad press and fiery criticism of her policies and actions, Noem is spitting mad at all of the filler faultfinders. She's not renowned for her sense of humor and ability to laugh at herself. And, just like her idol, Donald Trump, Noem appears to be painfully thin-skinned. Sadly, no cosmetic surgery procedures are available to fix that, so she's forced to suffer the indignity of becoming everybody's favorite punchline. Still, Noem isn't taking it on the (possibly lifted) chin, especially from "South Park" creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker.

"It's so lazy to make fun of women for how they look. Only the liberals and the extremists do that," Noem claimed on an August 2025 episode of "The Glenn Beck Program," omitting to mention which camp her boss falls into. "If they want to criticize my job, go ahead and do that, but clearly they can't. They just picked something petty like that."