Matt Lauer's New Relationship Is Full Of Painfully Obvious Red Flags

The following includes references to sexual assault allegations.

Matt Lauer's entire world came crashing down on him in 2017. Between 1997 and then, he was known across the country as an anchor on the "Today" show. He was also a married man. Coincidentally, 1997 also marked the year Lauer met Annette Roque, who later became his wife. And 2017 marked the year his marriage ended, though this wasn't a happy coincidence. Lauer and Roque's divorce was a direct consequence of the sex scandal that disgraced the once respected journalist. 

In November 2017, Lauer was fired after a colleague accused him of rape during the 2014 Winter Olympics in Russia. The following month, Lauer and Roque separated. His life was never the same, but it went on. Lauer found love again in Shamin Abas, a Welsh-born PR executive with Middle Eastern roots. Unlike pretty much everyone else, Abas was unfazed by the disturbing allegations against Lauer. "Shamin knows what he's been through and wants to be there for him for his next step in life," a source told ET in 2020.

In December 2025, it was even reported that Abas was working behind the scenes to aid Lauer in a TV comeback. "She is encouraging him to keep trying and she is definitely persistent. There have been instances of second and third acts with other stars, so they think people will give him a chance," a source told Page Six. Abas' attitude toward the serious allegations involving Lauer is a red flag, if you ask us. And it isn't the only one in Lauer's new relationship.

If you or anyone you know has been a victim of sexual assault, help is available. Visit the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network website or contact RAINN's National Helpline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673).

Matt Lauer may have started dating Shamin Abas in 2019, but they had known each other for close to two decades before then. That means Lauer met Abas through work shortly after he tied the knot with Annette Roque (seen above) in 1998. "They had a good solid foundation as friends and in business when they started dating, and the romance has grown over the years," a source told People in 2023. And those who knew Lauer and Abas weren't surprised that their friendship grew into something more after his divorce from Roque.

Abas became a support system amid the tumultuous split soon after Lauer's disturbing downfall. "Shamin has been a longtime friend to Matt and it's no surprise they've started dating. She was there for him throughout this process," the ET insider said. It's unclear whether Abas was friends with Roque as well during their marriage. However, the two women don't appear to be friendly in the aftermath of the divorce.

In 2021, Lauer and Abas attended a soirée in The Hamptons that Roque also attended. But the couple seemed to carefully avoid the former Dutch model, according to Radar. They seemingly remained civil, though. The outlet noted that Lauer and Abas were seen standing a few feet from Roque but were careful to avoid getting so close to the point of having to interact and being photographed together. It sure must be awkward for Roque seeing her ex with a woman he had been friends with throughout their time together.

Matt Lauer and Shamin Abas didn't wait long at all to turn their friendship into romance after his divorce from Annette Roque. Roque filed for divorce in July 2019, and proceedings became final the following September. Matt and Abas were first linked in December 2019, when they were seen boarding a plane ahead of a trip to New Zealand. However, Lauer and Roque had been separated for a while, with reports noting that the former "Today" show anchor had been in the dating game for some time before Abas.

Lauer believed he needed a romantic partner to help him overcome the turbulence of the previous years. "He has spent a great deal of time reflecting on his role in his downfall and knows the only way to get past this is to start over," the ET source said. He had reportedly been looking for a relationship after separating from Roque. "Since Matt's separation, he was quietly dating women, but hadn't been serious until now," the insider said.

Abas was the one who proved to have the willingness to stick by Lauer after everything that befell him. "She knows who he is," a source told InTouch in December 2019. "She's thrilled she's with him. She doesn't seem to have a care in the world." Lauer appreciated that Shamin reached out to offer support following the sex scandal and his split at a time when so many people shunned him. "She has stood by him," the ET insider noted.

When reports of Matt Lauer's relationship with Shamin Abas surfaced, one aspect of their romance that drew attention was his new girlfriend's striking resemblance to Annette Roque. Fellow travelers who were on the New Zealand-bound plane with the then-recent couple had to do a double-take after seeing Lauer's companion. "Some people thought it was Annette," a source told InTouch.

The issue comes up time and time again whenever Lauer and Abas are in the news. "He has a type," an X user commented under a news story. "Does anyone else think she looks like his ex wife?" another X user asked under a different photo of the couple. While some agreed, others argued that the resemblance lies primarily in the way Abas carries herself. "From far away. His ex wife is a beauty," another user replied in the thread. But their resemblance is present enough to suggest a potential underlying psychological issue at play

While there are many possible reasons for people being attracted to a certain type, some could indicate red flags. For example, Lauer may be subconsciously trying to resolve his past marital issues by dating someone who resembles his ex. Or he may feel safer with someone who reminds him of his past self. "Some researchers believe that stimuli which we see frequently may be more easily processed by the brain," social psychologist Madeleine A. Fugère told HuffPost in September 2025 about this phenomenon.

While she is no spring chicken, Shamin Abas is considerably younger than Matt Lauer. When they began dating in late 2019, she was 50, while he was 62. Their 12-year age difference means that Abas was around 30 and Lauer was in his mid-40s when they met at the turn of the century. While not scandalous, the age gap is considerable. But Lauer is no stranger to age-gap relationships.

Roque, who was his second wife, is also several years his junior. She was born in December 1966, while he was born in December 1957, meaning they are almost a decade apart. She was 30, and he was 39 when they met on a blind date in July 1997. Lauer's first marriage was also an age-gap relationship. Interestingly, though, he was the younger half of the couple. In 1981, Lauer tied the knot with Nancy Alspaugh, a producer and screenwriter whom he met at work in his early career.

Alspaugh was born in 1955, which makes her over two years older than her ex-husband. Unlike with Roque, Lauer's marriage to Alspaugh ended amicably in 1988. She even spoke out in his defense amid the sexual assault allegations. "He would give you the shirt off his back if you really needed it. He did that for everybody. From the lowest person on set to, you know, the highest powers," she told ET in 2017.

Matt Lauer has been in a relationship with Shamin Abas for years, but they don't have much to show for it. The two are rarely seen together, with their public outings being few and far between. Since their romance went public, Lauer and Abas have been spotted out and about a handful of times. They attended a car show in The Hamptons in July 2020 and were captured out shopping in New York City a few times after that.

The biggest public event they went to as a couple was the wedding of former CNN anchor Don Lemon and Tim Malone in April 2024 (seen above). They had also attended NBC producer Jennifer Long's nuptials the previous December, suggesting they were getting more comfortable with public outings. But, who knows? They are said to be enjoying their relationship just the way it is. "They try and stay out of the spotlight but are happy together and not interested in a high-profile life," a source told People in January 2023.

Lauer has reportedly found peace out of the spotlight. "[He is] very low key and likes to be off the radar," a source told People just a few months later. After everything that went down in his professional and personal life, Lauer is said to be protective of his relationship with Abas. "He is happy but prefers to lay low most of the time. When he goes out in public it is because he has causes and events that he cares about," the insider noted.